But What If It Was Deliberate?

So what with the 'myki' teething problems and the peak hour delays today, Metro aren't the most popular public transport operators in Melbourne. (Well they are, because they're the only ones, but that's not my point.)

But what if all the things that annoy us about public transport were in fact a service?

- Late trains: late, delayed, and cancelled trains serve an important and unique role in the public transport system. Too frequently commuters stumble into a train half awake, head to their job, before cramming back on, heading home, only to repeat it all the next day. When there is a delay, commuters do get angry. But when they're forced to wait for twenty minutes, it gives them a chance to cool down. They can examine their anger. Why are they angry? What are they going to be late for exactly? How important is it, in the scheme of a life which could end at any given moment?

Perhaps some compulsory reflection could produce a life-altering epiphany.

- Obnoxious fellow passengers: These are in fact highly skilled actors, carefully trained to play their parts with a nuanced, perceptively observed flair. Through forcing you to listen to them loudly recount in graphic detail and without discretion the minutiae of their lives, they invite you to wonder on the nature of human consciousness, of the relationships that bind people together, of the significance which people draw from their lives, the 'achievements' they value. The presence of obnoxious passengers assists train rides to become the introspective, reflective experience they are capable of becoming, experiences which enrich our day.

- Overly officious Public Transport Officers: Why do they take such pride in their job? What's their story? Why do you feel that mixture of polite hostility or forced friendliness and ease when they approach? Are their weighty metal badges affixed to their trenchcoats a tangible compensation for their role? Have the public institutions in Australia become more dehumanised, and if so, how can ordinary citizens go about reversing this?

- Mx: And if you don't want to ponder these things, then just completely halt all cognitive activity with a flick through the Mx, and lose yourself in a world of celebrities, half-thought through, obstinate opinion pieces, and the democratic zeitgeist that is "Vent Your Spleen".

Train journeys need not be a sluggish, mind-numbing crawl. Metro has provided us with everything we need to entertain ourselves. With so many things occurring within the train, there is always an abundance of philosophical musing to be had.

So thank you, Metro. For the things you give us, deliberately and unwittingly, I am thankful.