At the Movies, with the Dentist and Dental Assistant

Dentist (male): So are you going to the staff party this Saturday?

*whine of dental equipment as it nears my mouth*

Dental Assistant (female): Yeah, yeah...I thought I might go.

Dentist: Only it’s meant to be German themed, isn’t it? So they’ll have like....bratwurst...and...sauerkraut. They’re the only German foods I know.

Dental Assistant: But German food’s like, really fatty, you know?

Dentist (to me): Open a bit wider, please. (To Dental Assistant): Mm. I was watching Charlie and the Chocolate Factory on the weekend, and the German kid, he was really fat.

Dental Assistant: Ohhh, I don’t like the new one. The old one’s so much better.

Dentist: The new one’s the one where Johnny Depp is really creepy.

Dental Assistant: The old one was better. The new one...like, doesn’t have lollies there or anything.

Dentist: There are lollies in it...and the old one was dodgy, there was a giant gummie bear, and it was a balloon. And even as a kid, I was like ‘hey, that’s a balloon’.

Dental Assistant: Yeah, but the old one had better actors.

*conversation lull, as the dentist switches tools*

Dentist: Have you seen any good movies lately?

Dental Assistant: No...umm..OH, I saw Hot Tub Time Machine the other day. It was so stupid, don’t go see it.

Dentist: Oh...I thought it looked good from the ads.

Dental Assistant: Yeah, right...maybe you’d like it.

Dentist: What’s that ‘sposed to mean?

Dental Assistant: Oh, you know...

*silence*

Dentist (defensively): Oh, I suppose you’ve gone and seen Dear John?

Dental Assistant: No, I haven’t.

Dentist: Oh.

Dental Assistant: ...

*silence except for the dental tools*

Dentist: Ok champ, we’re done. You can have a rinse with the mouthwash.